Tuesday, February 9, 2010


If there is one thing that Moms obsess over more than anything else, it is sleep.

Either that their child doesn't nap long enough,

Doesn't go to sleep on their own,

Wakes in the night...

I 'm sure we could all make a mountain of a list citing all the grievances we have with sleep issues.

And you probably have a mountain of resources citing the many techniques used to get your babies to sleep.

Unless of course you are one of *those* who has a baby that has slept through the night since 6 weeks...and is a good napper.

If you are that Mama...you are lucky.

I'm not that Mama.

M woke every two hours until he was 11 months. It then filtered down to once or twice a night.

Then magically at 16 months he slept through the night.

I tried letting him cry it out.

He and I were both not cut out for it.

I include him in this equation because instead of the crying getting shorter, it got longer.

And I wasn't up to the task....all 4 times that I tried.

After three nights of it getting worse, not better, I stopped.

I never once made it past 45 minutes.

I'm okay with this, but I wasn't at the time.

I tormented myself that I should try harder and that my inconsistencies would ruin his sleep habits forever.

He is now a great sleeper.

A solid 11 hours per night and usually a 2 hour nap after lunch.

Enter J.

I told myself that I wasn't going to get myself worked up over his sleep habits.

I let him nap when he wanted.

He had a routine instead of a schedule.

He slept like a dream until 4 months...then it all went to sh*t.

He is now waking every two hours, and my patience is dwindling.

I have been letting him cry just long enough to figure out that I don't jump to attention for his Majesty.

But his personality is so different than M's.

He is so much more expressive. You know when he means business.

Which is why again I am having a hard time with the whole CIO technique.

I would like to take that technique and shove it up the nostrils of the persons responsible for making Mamas feel like they have to do this to get their child to sleep.

I did it tonight to J. He cried maybe for 10 or 15 minutes while I shushed him and rubbed his back.

When he stopped and rolled on his tummy and closed his eyes, he did that weird, can't catch my breathe after crying so hard, thing.

It has been all I can think about all night. Poor babe.

It makes me feel like a crappy Mom.

Interestingly enough however, I am not alone.

I know his because I consulted my new magazine that just happened to have a feature on sleep.

Check out these statistics based on almost 1000 peeps with babies’ surveyed from Today’s Parent Mag:

• 53% of babies between 6 to 12 months wake most nights...woowza.
• 20% wake more than 3 times ...That's me folks.
• 53% tried controlled crying...Have you?
• 36% tried controlled crying before the recommended 6 months....I know someone who did it at 6 weeks with success.
• 43% who tried it started a round of it 4 or 5 times...that's me again.
• 80% of parents and experts make controlled crying sound easier and more foolproof than it is...Sooo true.
• 73% of parents rated it as stressful on the parents...really Sherlock?
• 63% rated it as stressful on the child. *crickets*

They concluded that in the cases that it didn't work it was due to the fact that the parents didn't believe in the technique, disagreed that they could actually control their child’s sleep habits, or had no support .

I fall into the first two of those explanations.

So why did I do it? Why am I trying it with J? To say that I did? Because it feels like the expectation? Because maybe it might only be 10 minutes of crying before he falls into a blissful sleep?

I have no clue.

I told myself I wasn't going to get wrapped up in this crap and here I go again.

And I know he will eventually sleep through the night, on his own, bunked in with his brother.

I know in my heart it will happen.

Eventually right?


Sleeping  babies are probably the most beautiful things in the world...so peaceful.


Nighty Night.


  1. So cute,you are right.Mommys are the ones that gets it all

  2. They look so precious when they sleep!

  3. This is why I dislike people. lol. Do what works for you and J. end. of. conversation. Grrrrrrrr. Why do some many people stress when in then end nobody freakin' cares anyway? The whole sleep/food/growth/speaking/walking/critisizing thing makes my left eye twitch too. It also makes me give people the stink eye with the right.

  4. I kept a journal when my oldest was a baby, and in it I wrote something along the lines of "I have never spent so much time thinking and obsessing about poop and sleep."

    And so is the life of a mom. This stage will pass and the frustration of it will start to dim. Trust me. (But then other problems take its place...is there no end??)

  5. It'll happen. My second sleeps much better than my first, but they share a room, so it'll never be perfect.

    Do what works best for YOU. What gets YOU the most sleep. Your kids will catch up eventually.

    (Says the woman who has no intention of taking away her 2YOs pacifier. Probably not the best judge of these things!)