In my bucket for 2010.

Of course I wish for world peace, good health for all of my friends and family.

But what I really wish  for is for some changes with me.

I hope to lose this stoopid 20 pounds that won't go away.

I hope to have the energy and the motivation to really get it done. 

I hope to be more patient with those I love.

I hope to be a better parent.

I hope to be a better friend.

I hope to be a better partner.

I hope to judge people less.

I hope to not carry any resentment in my heart.

I hope to teach my children more about faith.

I hope to speak my feelings in a concise manner so the message doesn't get lost.

I hope to organize my closets.

I hope to scrapbook more often

I hope to be published in a scrap magazine.

I hope my bonus when I return to work is a good one so I can put up a fence and install central air.

I hope that my boys continue to thrive in this home we create for them.

I hope that my dream of blinking my eyes and a majic genie appearing finally works.

I hope to nurture and grow the love between B and myself.

I hope to let go of the guilt I carry with me everytime I do something just for me.

I hope that I get a raise.

I hope to save enough to payback  1/2 of what was withdrawn from savings to buy this house.

I hope to buy a new vacum....of the dyson variety.

I hope to continue this new found love with my brand new slow cooker.

I hope that everytime I click my heals together I will end up right back here in this life.

May 2010 be the year that you hope it to be.

To sum it all up......

I got sick on Christmas Eve.

M got sick on Boxing Day.

J got sick yesterday.

There have been lots of snuggles and bed sharing.

No one has slept in what seems like an etermity.

I haven't put on normal clothes after showering in 3 days.

I haven't left the house in two days.

I really want to scrap but I am not feeling inspired.

I don't really feel like blogging.

I have only been reading my very favorites in google reader.

I am however feeling the need to purge.

To take inventory.

To resolve.

That has been my life for the past week.

Scintillating isn't it???

All was merry and bright....

It was a wonderful Christmas.

I made what can only be descibed as the most hideous gingerbread rice krispy house there ever was.

Mom and I spent Christmas Eve day in the kitchen preparing food for the next day.  I was convinced that we would not get through the presents in time to get the turkey in the oven in order for it to be ready at a reasonable hour.  Incidently I was right and I'm glad we made it ahead of time.  Who doesn't like cold turkey anyway?

Mom and I took the Babes to an early Mass.  I left with the boys half way through and went for a drive.  Mass was packed and we were down in the basement where the service was piped in.  One woman was giving my child the stink eye for banging on a piano(not ours) and promptly told her child it was too noisy for church and put it out of their reach.  I was feeling slightly miffed as we were in the basement at a childrens mass while everyone was talking and not paying attention but what evs.  I left and stewed about it for a while then decided that it wasn't worth it to be angry.

Incidently B opted out of Church...big suprise there.

On Christmas Eve we don't usually have a regular dinner, just a mish mash of things we don't normally have.  This year we had Meatpie, double stuffed baked potatoes, baked brie, veg and dip....A very weird but very satisfying combo.

After baths we tracked Santa to see where he was (Ireland), put out cookies and milk for Santa and some carrot stickes for the reindeer.  We took down our socks from the banister and placed them under the tree and placed baby Jesus in the manger.  M is a huge fan of our little people nativity set.

Santa came early.  I happen to know this because I woke at 10:00pm and he had come and gone.

Christmas morning was wonderful.  I am so glad we cooked that Turkey the day before because we were sitting by that tree from 7:00am till 12:00pm.  Yes that is right....5 hours to open presents.  We are fans of spreading it out.  M didn't really know what to do at first.  He also was overwhelmed by our new family pet.

Her name is Kota and she was and still is a hit. 

M finally warmed up to the opening of presents around 10:30 and started ripping into things.

J wanted in on some of the action.

Yep, that is a Jack in the box for J....hehehehe.  (I am brilliant sometimes.)

It really was a special and magical day for us and I really didn't give two poops that I looked like poop.

I was just happy to have my little family tucked in with me.

When all was said and done at our house (258 pictures later and a PJ change for M as he spilled his cereal everywhere),  We went to my sisters house for dinner, and had more present opening and photo opps there.  Hopefully she will post some so I can steal them.

Today I enjoyed a quiet day with my two Boys.  B had to work and I relished in the fact that this was one Boxing Day that I didn't have to endure the madness.  I was going to shop but we are in the midst of a wicked ice storm so I stayed put, napped with the babes and enjoyed leftovers all day.

Indeed it was my favorite Christmas ever.

x/o
J

Make it count.

I haven't really felt like blogging as of late.

It has been so cold here, all I really feel like doing is staying in my PJ's all day and snuggling and playing with my  Kidlets.

This year I am trying to savour the moments.

I know this is pretty much the last year I will have time off during the holidays.

My career choice doesn't exactly allow for vacation at this time of year.

Amidst this years hustle and bustle I just want to remember how lucky I am to have two beautiful children and a ridiculously funny and loving partner.

I really want this one to count, I know at this time next year I will be back in the thick of things and times like these will be far and few between.

So my Bloggy Blog Friends, to that end I will wish you A Merry Christmas now. 

I'm going to enjoy these next few days with the boys,

Do some baking,

Hunker down with Google reader when the time is right and the babes are in bed.

I hope your Holidays are filled with much love and happiness and that you are surrounded by all those you love.

Merry Ho Ho.


P.S.  Speaking of counting, I cam across this video of M on crackbook the other day.  In an effort to sort my videos I happened to delete the original file from my computer and I am trying to figure out how to restore it.  For now I am immortalizing it here.

He was 18 months old at the time.....does a kid get any cuter???

Enjoy and try to ignore my giddy mommy voice.

So long 35!!!

Just two weeks before the end of 2009 I leave 35, and I am reminded of thirty-five things that happened this year.



1. Grandma. She passed away on the very last day of 2008. She is missed.

2. Michaels 2nd Christmas. It was one of the best I had ever had. Gift opening went on for hours, not because of the amount of gifts but just so we could savor the moment. It would be our last Christmas as a family of three.


3. Morning sickness. Three long months of it.

4. Weight gain. All 60 pounds of it.

5. Fatigue. I'm talking in bed at 7:30pm asleep, snoring fatigue.

6. Michael being baptized and the flock of Canadian Geese that flew over the church that afternoon. By flock I really mean 14 thousand of those crazy birds that by sheer luck missed dropping any of their droppings on us.

7. The last time I saw my Grandma coherent. Incidentally it was the day of M's Baptism. I am forever thankful for that day.

8. Work. It really, really, really sucked huge from October on. Partially because I don't do pregnant well and partially for reason I can't discuss. Those reasons have been removed and I am anticipating a smooth transition when I go back.

9. M finally sleeping through the night. Incidentally it came exactly to the day that found out that I was pregnant with him two years prior. If you're wondering about the math, he was 16 months.

10. Final Clearance in February. I scored the boys Christmas present for this year for a whopping eleven bucks. It retails for almost four hundred. I can't wait to show you pics.

11. Finding Blog World. Who knew I would have such a fascination with other peoples lives.

12. The snow starting to melt. Around here that is always cause for celebration.

13. Feeling sorry for myself because B was spending more time with M than I was.

14. M starting coping attitude about me working and some days not smiling or hugging me at all. At the time I thought my heart was going to break.

15. Wanting to kick B out of bed every night.

16. My Baby shower. It rained but it was great. Mostly because I HAD one this time. Those of you, who know me, know what happened the first time around.

17. Easter. I have the funniest Video of M and his cousin C singing. It was also very cool to do M's first Egg hunt.

18. Speaking of Easter, B and I took a belly to belly shot to compare with the first......WOW is all I can say.

19. STOOOPID SCIATIC NERVE ISSUES. Have I ever mentioned that I hated being pregnant?

20. Not being able to walk faster than an ant for longer than thirty minutes the last month of my pregnancy. Apparently 2009 was all about pissy preggars.

21. The 6 weeks that I was able to spend at home with M before the birth of J. I loved it. I was hideously tired and counted the minutes till nap time but I savored every moment of it.

22. M's 2nd birthday. I put up balloons all over the house the night before and we set up all his new play structures in the backyard while he napped the day of. I'd like to think he remembers but I’m fairly certain he doesn't.   M's birthday balloons that stayed attached to his chair for at least 4 weeks after his birthday. I'm sorry but the helium fire truck balloon cost 12 dollars and I wanted to get my moneys worth. Plus he loved it.

23.  The warp speed that M's communication grew.

24. Deciding on J's name the day before he was born. FYI his name was my choice and had been on the table since conception...someone was just being difficult.

25. The morning M became a big brother. It was sunny and cool. I was uber excited, nervous and scared shitless.

26. WALKING into the hospital. So different than with M. I walked up to the triage desk in Labor and Delivery and said; "One baby boy please." Nurse Lady smiled and sent me to the waiting room.

27. My Sister. Have I ever mentioned to you how awesome she is? She stayed at the hospital for 8 hours, mainly alone in the waiting room the day J was born. We laughed and laughed while waiting for B to show up. Mainly we were laughing at a janitor who was clearly unionized and would only clean 12 square feet of tile. She also stayed the whole time I was in recovery only to get a little glimpse of her new nephew because they wouldn't let her in. Some new rule about baby snatching........

28. 3:30pm exactly on June 1st, my littlest angel was born.

29. A complete sense of peace that came over me when I was able to hold J for the first time. I knew I could take care of him and M. I knew everything would be okay. We campaigned to leave the hospital a day early because I couldn't stand to be away from M any longer.

30. M "petting" J as his way of welcoming him to the herd.  He loves his little brother.

31. M deciding he was going to start hitting and using me as the punching bag.  Oh yes and the begining of the terrible twos....

32. Being more than thankful for my Mom keeping M occupied while I got to know J.  And for spending time with J when I needed to spend time with M.

33. My Family meeting the boys. It was so nice to have Grammy H and Aunty K reunite with M and it was awesome for Uncle J to come and visit.

34. B and I working at it. I love him. He is a good Dad and a good partner.

35. The complete and utter sense of happiness when I look at the two little people that I made with B.















I think I could go on and on with gentle reminders of what thirty-five was like for me, but in an effort to keep you awake I will stop there. However I will say this; I am excited for thirty-six. I know this year is going to be great. The first three months will probably suck for various reasons, mainly snow and money related but I have my family nestled in tightly beside me as we wait out the winter months.



See ya 35...it was nice knowing you!

My newest...and some random tidbits.

Can you guess why this one is now one of my favorites:

And now you know my kids names.

What a happy Christmas this will be.

I finished a whole slew of layouts this week.  I'm trying really hard to ensure J's book is done before I return to work. 

I really love how J's 5 month one turned out.  It was from a sketch but it ended up not really looking like the sketch.  I submitted it anyways. 

The last one is one that I wanted to do for a while.  The pictures are really old but I really wanted to document M's love of books and reading and how much he retains of those silly stories.

And last but not least of what is turning out to be a very photo heavy post, we made some sugar cookies with the kids yesterday.  My mom started this with M last year.  She made the cookies and then let him ice them.  This year all he wanted to do was eat the icing.  It kept him busy all of 10 minutes. 

As you can see I am not very discriminating when it comes to choosing photos to post.  That face kills me.

Off to bed.  I have a stoopid stye in my eye.  Apparently it is my bodies newest way of informing me that I am exhausted.

I am also too tired to spell check.

Nighty Night

Jingle Ball

Okay so maybe it doesn't jingle,


Or jangle,

Or make any noise at all,

But it happens to be my favorite ball.

Of the Christmas variety......

And it came from a special store, from a special person.

There used to be a store at the Rideau Centre call "Just Curious".

It carried all sorts of Canadian made goods and tons of great gift giving ideas.

Sadly, Rideau Centre in an effort to increase traffic and customer appeal is slowly not renewing leases of stores that don't appeal to those who shop the downtown core.

Every time I walk through there I am thrilled that there are a ton of new stores.

I won't lie that I was tickled pink when I saw the new Michael Kors store.

But I was also sad.

Just Curious is no longer there, recently replaced by a Calvin Klein lingerie store.

My sister and I used to stalk that store before and after Christmas in search of all sorts of unique ornaments.

Usually on Boxing Day the ornaments would be anywhere from 50 to 75 percent off.

One day when we saw the sale sign up we literally ran to the store to score some Christmas goodies.

I spotted this ball and I was in love.

It was so ornate and beautiful.

It was also the tiniest ball you have ever seen.

I don't remember why I didn't get it but after exiting the store my Sister handed me a little something wrapped in tissue.

I'm sure you can figure out what was inside.

Every year when I decorate my tree I think about that store and where I will go to find all those special one of a kind items.

And I think about my Sister and her generous spirit.

Thanks Sam.

I hope today is filled with all the things you love.

Happy Birthday!

There are Little People under my tree.

I am Catholic.



I don't necessarily feel on any given day that I am a GOOD Catholic.



I struggle with allot of religious concepts.



I became really angry listening to one particular sermon the last time I went to Church.



It was about divorce.



I won't go into the details because the Priest redeemed himself at the end.



Church does that to me.



It makes me emotional.



I have no idea why but I could burst into tears during the Lords Prayer.



I struggled with the decision to get my children baptized.



I wanted to do it for the right reason.



I wanted them to have FAITH.



To BELIEVE in something bigger than all of us.



I wanted to be a good example to them.



I wanted them to go to a better school.



Yes I am aware that that is a crappy reason.



However in the public schools here they don't even sing the NATIONAL anthem anymore.



SERIOUSLY?



I became better.



I try to go to mass as much as I can.



And it makes me smile when M says we are going to see JESUS.



It also makes the other parishioners smile because he is not quiet about it.



I'm not perfect and don't pretend to be.



I haven't been to MASS in 5 weeks.



I won't go with my babies until they get their H1N1 shot.



I am just not going down that road.



Please don't question that logic.



So in an effort to teach my child about CHRISTMAS I wanted a Nativity set for under my tree.



I have no idea why I felt such a strong urge to do this.



In all of my grown up years I have never had one.



I guess it is just another little thing about kids that changes you.



But here is the thing.



I hate saying NO.



Along with DON'T TOUCH THAT!!!!!!!!!!



Kids are curious and they NEED to explore.



And I want him to touch,



And learn,



And play,



And believe,



And have faith.



Which is why I am so thankful to have found this:

On Christmas Eve I plan to have M put in Baby Jesus.

May your holidays be as blessed as ours.

x/o

J

Kitty Cup

Our Family has the uncanny ability to take a new found favorite sport, craft, pet, color etc and produce some sort of gift that perfectly resonates that new favorite sport, craft, pet, color etc.

For example, when I bought my first couch, it was a deep eggplant purple. I was given purple vases, purple linens, and purple decorations....purple purple purple.

Don't mis-read that for overkill. I enjoy it. In fact I happen to do the same thing to B. He has a plethora of golf paraphernalia hanging around. Business card holders, boxer shorts, wall hangings. You name it, he has it.

It is a certified sickness in my family.

Truly.

But it is what makes us "special".

We take the time to acknowledge what make each of us tick.

We search for that perfect gift and we know that when we give it, it will be well received.

Which is why when I received this ornament from my Sister, I was touched.

It looks like my cat Zippy, who is white,

In a tea cup.

Tea is a Favorite drink.

Love it.

Our first stockings

B's Mom used to send us stockings every year.


They were more gift bags stuffed to the gills with goodies than stockings, but we still called them socks.

About 5 years ago we got the call that every child adult dreads.

The socks were to be no more.

APPARENTLY a poll was taken unbeknownst to B and myself and it was decided that a gift would replace the sock.

*GASP*

Yeah........ I think I speak for B and myself when I say:

WTF???????

Okay yes we are grown-ups here but come on....

This was our Christmas sock we are talking about.

We loved our socks.

We got over it.

Sort of.

Thankfully we still had someone else that made us socks.

But part of OUR tradition together had been erased.

So we did what any couple would do, or probably had been doing all along and we were just a little slow on the uptake.

We started buying socks for each other.

That first year we went off to Wal-Mart and went in separate directions with our shopping carts in search of goodies to stuff each others sock with.

We inadvertently bumped into each other a few times but quickly took off in different directions not wanting each other to see what was in our basket.

I have to say that first year was really fun and I’m pretty sure we spent way more on each others sock then we did on gifts.

On Christmas morning we were pretty stoked to open our stash.

Before kids we either opened gifts at night and slept in, or opened in the morning then went back to bed.

That year we opened in the morning.

As I was opening mine I came across a box all stuffed with tissue.

Underneath all the tissue was a blown glass snowman that was the cutest thing I had ever seen.

I was so touched that he had picked an ornament for me that suited my taste.

It hangs right near the top of the tree away from prying hands and curious cats.

And it is another one of those ornaments that will automatically provoke an ass whooping if broken.

Our first time....

....alone at Christmas was not fun for me.

I hated being away from my family,

I called them every two hours it seemed.

It was silly really b/c we were less then three hours from home.

I made turkey dinner for the first time,

but ate it alone because HE was napping.

The gravy exploded all over the stove

because I tried to make it in a pyrex dish.

HE tried to recreate part of his traditions though.

HE made a chicken noodle omlette for breakfast.

Then,  I thought it was bizarre.

Now I can't live without them.

At the time it was sad to me that we were alone.

Today it is a reminder of how far we have come.

Over twelve years together.

Longer than alot of marriages.

WE work hard at it.

WE laugh at ourselves often.

WE are snippy at each other more than I would like to be.

WE created two beautiful children together.

And everytime I look at this ornament that I bought on our very first Christmas,

I think about how much I love HIM.

He's all mine.....and all His.

M that is.

Today was a little rough.

A little scary.

Tested my strength as a Mom.

Tested our strength as a team.

Something as small as gashed tongue,

(Which FYI was not so small and left me feeling sick to my stomach all day)

Reminds me of the gift we have been given.

Today it was a tongue.

Tomorrow it could be more serious.

We are so lucky to be a family.

I am so lucky to lean on B and be the level headed one in these situations.

I do not do well with blood.

I do not do well with accidents.

I do not do well when my kids get hurt.

I'm sure that sick feeling never goes away.

Today I am reminded that things are just things.

They can be replaced.

He can't.

He is clumsy like me.

And he has no fear like his Dad.

I am in for one hell of a ride with this child of mine

So today I was  more patient.

He was aloud to look and touch.

But he still had to be careful.

That snowman seems to be a favorite of his.

Back tomorrow to continue "The Ornament Cronicles"

Thanks for stopping by and having a boo.

x/o

J

My Vintage Snowman

I love this guy.

And by love, I mean LOVE.

He is so special to me in so many ways.

My Brother bought him for me the last Christmas we celebrated together.

I know he didn't have tons of money but when I opened this I was blown away.

I felt as though he had searched far and wide to find the perfect thing for me.

He hit it bang on.

I don't think I ever got to tell him that.

Tell him how much I love this guy.

How much I look forward to digging out his own special shinny red box every year.

Unwrapping his feet that dangle together from their special plastic packaging.

Thinking about him and missing him each time I look at my special vintage snowman.

Frig.

I hate that he is gone and that we don't have any more Christmases.

I hate that it is 7 years later and that I still can't write something about him without a pool of tears  in my eyes that are blurring my vision.

I hate it.

But I love my special vintage snowman.

And if any of my kids break this guy I think I may ground them for eternity.

Prophylactic Snowman

I have to honest here.

I could not wait to post this guy.

I was twitchy all day giggling to myself.

This guy was in my sock from Mom last year.

I have no other words.

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse

I come from a family of crafty women.




These women make everything.



They can sew anything.



AN Y THING!



My Grandmother, when I was young, made me and my sister all kinds of Barbie furniture.



We had the best Barbie stuff ever.



I was broken hearted as a child when we left B.C. and moved here, leaving some of those treasures behind.



If I could go back in time, my choices would be different.



My Handmade Raggedy Ann (again made from my Grandma) and my Barbie furniture would have made the cut.



But at a mere 10 years old how do you choose between those and the very first pink puppy stuffy that your parents gave you on that last Christmas that we spent there?



Hard choices to make.



Life is like that...allot of tough choices that are made and as a child you never really now why they were made or if you are lucky, you are completely oblivious.



I think I was lucky.



I know now that we had allot of tough Christmases.



Tough in the sense that my Mother, who is so kind hearted and giving, couldn't always give the things that she wanted to give.



She did such a good job of raising us that we never knew the difference until we were older and wiser and started to ask for things.



But even then when we did get some of those more expensive gifts, we KNEW that there were sacrifices made for us to have them.



I am so thankful for all I had as a child.



Because really, I KNOW there are some that had less.



So back to crafty.



My Mom made us all an ornament one year.



For the life of me I can't remember what color my Brothers was.



I'm fairly certain my Sisters was light blue with pink.



Mine was red.



I have had this ornament ever since I can remember; honestly I don't know the year. (Mom?)



I have always hung it proudly on my tree along with all my other store bought ones.



It looks so simple to make that I hope one day we can sit down together and make some for the boys.



And I really hope they enjoy theirs as much as I have enjoyed mine.



Thanks Mom.

The right foot

As you could probably tell from my first post on this very lovely first day of December, it did not start out well.


In fact it was the very opposite of great.

And if you are my Facebook friend you know that it started with a temper tantrum that landed M in his room.

TWICE.

BEFORE 7:00AM.

It sucked huge.

I really wanted to start December off right. It is such a busy month for our family with what seems like a kajillion birthdays as well as the holidays. I feel so fortunate that I am not working  for what may probably be my last December for a VERY long time so I really want to treasure this one. I had plans of snapping a photo per day and doing some sort of scrap/blog thing but tonight I decided that it wasn't in the cards. I don't have that much creative time and I don't want to feel the pressure of falling behind each day. So in my infinite wisdom I came up with a different plan.

Wait.

For.

It.

I'm going to document my holiday home.

Gay right?

Okay so more specifically I was looking at all my decorations and ornaments and thinking about the sentimental value that they hold to me.  I want my kids to know why they were special to me because one day they will be theirs and I truly hope they treasure each and every one of them like I do.  Some of these ornaments move me to tears and others make me laugh uncontrollably.  I hope you enjoy their stories and maybe it will inspire you to do the same.

Here's to December starting off on the right foot.

Happy Holidays.

x/o
J